ABOUT 2018-01-08T03:07:11+00:00

ABOUT

It’s time to welcome back to the stage Australia’s biggest band of the 70s that you’ve never heard of. In the 1970’s, deep down under and even deeper in the bush, DEEP THROAT were on the cusp of being acknowledged as the biggest, baddest and naughtiest band in all of the wonderful sunburnt land of OZ. Unfortunately, whilst attending a party at Molly Meldrum’s Toorak mansion the band mysteriously “disappeared”.

DEEP THROAT were lost and trapped in Molly Meldrum’s basement, for 40 years. Conspiracy theories abound as to why the band disappeared. Lead throat – Rock Hardwood believes it was due to the fact that he did not have the right stage name.

“Molly liked lead singers with girly names like Shirley, Squeak and Daryl” – “Frankly, we think Molly made sure we couldn’t be found.”

Legend has it that DEEP THROAT were about to sign the most lucrative contract that Mushroom Records and Michael Gudinski had ever offered a young Aussie band. Unfortunately, due to the fact Gudinski couldn’t find DEEP THROAT, he signed some brats called Skyhooks instead.

Lost in the basement, with nothing to do but watch episodes of Countdown, Number 96 and The Banana Splits, the boys increased their alcohol intake, honed their musical skills, drank more alcohol and now the boys are back in town! Australia’s biggest band of the 70s, are finally back together again and it’s gonna’ be a DEEP 70’s experience. We encourage everyone to get involved and to come dressed in their funkiest 70’s threads.

Who are DEEP THROAT?

Let’s meet the members of this legendary – Adelaide based – Australian band.

Rock Hardwood (Throat)

The singer is universally regarded as the most interesting member of any rock band. In most modern rock, they are usually seen as the only interesting member. This is semi-justifiable, as virtually all modern rock bands suck. Singers have the biggest egos of any person in a band. In fact, singers have the biggest egos of any person on the planet. Singers are the band member most likely to be a girl, even if they are a boy.

In 1974, Rock Hardwood was voted the hottest looking singer in Port Adelaide for 6 consecutive weeks in the TV Week Logie Awards. According to Rock Hardwood – the fact that virtually all of the voting slips received by TV Week had been filled out by his mum is “irrelevant”.

Dick Tingler (Guitar)

Originally rose to marginal fame with 60’s hair metal demi-gods ‘Harold Holt’s Snorkel’. DEEP THROAT lead singer Rock Hardwood spotted Dick playing in a local pub. As soon as Rock and Dick sat down, a union stronger than fire was forged. Formerly a cigarette-taster for Winfield, Dick was trained at an early age on the recorder. He switched to guitar when Rock told him he’d pull more chicks.

Dick wrote DEEP THROAT’s seminal power ballad “I Want Your Cans” and the title track to their hit album “Come Taste the Tongue”. A song infamously performed on the Peter Andre-hosted episode of ‘Hey Hey It’s Saturday’. With a song in the forthcoming Vince Colosimo film, Street Hero 3 – The Wizard Of Ice, Dick is poised and ready to drift out as a solo artist, although he calls it, “Just an album, DEEP THROAT ain’t breaking up no time soon.”

Rock Hardwood describes Dick’s playing as “pretty f*ckin’ decent” and describes him as full of “Rebellious Rhythm and Fire-Breathing Ferocity and Shit”.  As Rock Hardwood is so often quoted as saying – “Old Dick, is definitely full of shit.”

Leroy Thunderpants Jnr. (The Pool Cleaner)

Is a master of every known Pool Cleaning technique and the inventor of several others. He is considered to be the best Pool Cleaning bass guitar player in the world. Leroy would like to thank: The Munsters, Hong Kong Phooey, Ghandi, Helen of Troy, Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart, Wilbur Worm and Rice Bubbles breakfast cereal. Leroy’s message to all the ladies: “You’re welcome”!

Wilbur Wang (The Penist)

Was born and raised by wild donkeys. He decided to become a Penist after seeing TV for the first time. It was an episode of The Liberace Show followed by an airing of West Side Story. Occasionally, the singer may want to do a piano ballad to show off their emotional side, which the keyboard player will usually consider their “time to shine.” They are wrong. It’s the singer’s time to shine. Nobody gives a shit about the one playing piano. Unless they’re a girl, in which case, the level of giving-a-shit is directly proportional to the level of hotness.

Apart from piano ballads, keyboard players spend most of their time coming up with crazy new sounds that nobody’s ever heard, perfect for putting in the background where nobody can hear them. As a side note, a keyboard solo at any live concert is a guaranteed way to depress an entire audience.

Wilbur is a mathematics genius and has calculated that he is the 14th best keyboardist who has ever lived. When asked if there’s any special donkey in his life, his reply was “They’re ALL special.” Wilbur’s favourite food is Whiskey.

Hugh Jorgan III (Drums)

Hugh joined DEEP THROAT after rescuing lead singer – Rock Hardwood from an avalanche while working ski patrol at Mount Lofty. Hugh was a little known and even lesser talented, former child television, movie actor. His main claim to fame is the straight to video movie appearance in the cult favourite 70’s disaster flick, ‘Marsupials from Mars’, where Hugh starred alongside, Abigail, Graham Kennedy, Fat Cat and Skippy The Bush Kangaroo. According to Hugh, after one particularly long day shooting, followed by a 3 day Bundaberg rum and magic mushroom bender, Skippy taught Hugh how to fly a helicopter. Apparently Skippy also gave flying lessons to Shirley Strachan.

Hugh’s problems with being unable to focus on anything and his exceptionally short attention span led him to switch from drumming to acting then back to drumming again, back to acting and back to drumming again. All of which took place on a Tuesday afternoon in 1976.

Hugh’s first taste of musical fame came with his first group, ‘Boy-Skool’ (later changing their name to) ‘Blue Ring’. Their seminal hits “Grab A Pick And Pick Yourself Up,” and the gender bending “Buddy You’re A Good Girl” were played on high rotation in his mums lounge room and at a handful of blue light discos in un-named and unknown areas of regional South Australia.